Life with...

I was committed to integrate and to make my time in Malawi an experience to remember, to learn before teaching, to share before taking, and to accept before rejecting.  I have been here almost a year and have already learned so much, shared many memories, and accepted the newness of a quirky culture.  Many of the lessons I have learned over this past year go back to one of my first experiences when I was in training, living in rural villages with traditional families known as “homestay”, an encounter to better understand village life.   

It was our introduction to life without.  Life without running water, life without electricity, life without toilets, life without phones, life without technology, life without furniture, life without utensils, so on and so on and so on.  Seriously, it is like living in the 1800s.  With much of my free time I have been able to read more than ever before.  I love reading Tolstoy because Russia in the 1800s feels like the future, Westerns seem like my Saturday mornings starting a fire for cowboy coffee, and adventures of minimalists abandoning everything to live off the land seems like a luxury, and Kurt Vonnegut…well he’s just a good author.  

In homestay we sat on reed mats with our “families” eating the traditional food, of this impoverished place, with our hands.  It was a good introduction into what life looks like for subsistence farmers living in chronic poverty.  I was set on having this experience bring my values and beliefs into action, of loving others through shared experiences and integrating as best as I could.  So on the second day in homestay I woke up free from jet lag and ready to dive in.  My host mother served hot, rice porridge and she offered me a spoon in the local vernacular and expressive gestures..  (Internal Scoff, A Spoon?  Do I look like a rookie?)  No, I am determined to integrate.  I graciously declined…I’ve got this, I said in English with an overactive smile and waving my hands.

The porridge was hot and running through my fingers.  Difficult to eat with my hands.  But I was determined.  I kept with it.  I should probably mention I can be stubborn.  And slowly reaching defeat I looked up to see my host mom (23), host sister (8), and host brother (3) all using spoons.  I looked like a savage and a fool.  I realized that I was trying to integrate for myself not for others.  It was then I realized I needed to follow and not lead on my own.  I needed to observe before participating. I needed to ask questions, I needed to learn my own limitations, and I needed to be humble.  And most certainly I needed to accept a spoon when offered a spoon. 

If I am unable to live in humble conditions with humility (and the ability to be laughed at and laugh at myself) I will only see this Peace Corps experience as life without.  And I will miss the Life with…

Life with adventure, Life with compassion, Life with growth, Life with generosity, Life with peace and sometimes Life with SPOONS!